As the holidays approach, or rather, the holiday retail season, there are a lot of expectations of joy, celebration, and happiness. When there are expectations of holiday cheer ringing from the 24-hour Christmas music station, it's easy to get sucked in without even knowing it's happened.

Those expectations can be dangerous. Detrimental to having a good time. Detrimental to your health and well-being, and detrimental to those around you.

It seems like the U.S. version of the holidays doesn't make any room for emotions other than happiness and joy. Certainly not sadness, anger, or heaven forbid, grief. But this time of year, when there is so much pressure to be jolly, is often when those other emotions arise with important information.

In our culture of doing, just allowing ourselves to sit with how we feel is going against the grain. Making time for feeling emotions and considering what information they bring to light may seem like a mystical practice only for ascetics and people who have more time than we do.

When you listen to your emotions, then actions that support your values, help you stay aware of changes around you, help you move forward with your goals and dreams, and help you let go of what's not working are all part of it.

Your anger asks, "what do I value?," and helps you take action to maintain your values.

Your fear asks, "what action should be taken?," and keeps you aware of changes around you.

Your envy and anxiety help inform you about what you want for your future, and what you need to do to make that happen.

Your sadness asks, "what needs to be released?," and, "what needs to be rejuvenated?," so that you stay in the flow of your emotions.

Over the last 2 weeks of December, I ripped out and recycled papers from a bunch of notebooks, something I've been meaning to do for years.

One of the notebooks I found was from 2008, when I lived in Yosemite and worked at the employee recreation center, wiping down exercise machines and leading knit nights. This particular notebook was full of highlighted and underlined notes, all relating to my Chinese astrological chart.

When I was 25, I made a decision. I was going to pursue happiness, because that was the point of life, right?

Since I felt happiest when I was climbing, I moved to Bend, Oregon, took a job as a server, and headed out to Smith Rock to climb as often as I could.

I thought this would make me happy, and indeed, there were moments of peace, of joy, even happiness. But overall, the feeling was fleeting, and I wanted to feel happy all the time. I thought I could feel happy all the time. I thought that all the happy people I knew were also feeling happy all the time.

Panic belly

Anxious mind

Quiet it with deep gulps of coffee, two squares of dark chocolate.

It doesn't quiet it, it distracts it.

Last minute make a sign.